‘Scandal’ Recap – “Honor Thy Father” (S4:E18)

A.k.a. “Shonda STAY Taking Me Through Changes!” #ICantBreathe!

(1) Jake is like “Immunity? Man are you crazy??” Do you not know how this works??? #DeathWarrant #WeAllGonnaDie

(2) David Rosen sounds like an idiot trying to throw that “white hats/good guys” rhetoric in Jake’s face. And then even crazier with “if you don’t testify I can’t protect you” Ha!! And then Jake put your face on your desk “but who’s gonna protect YOU Mr. Attorney General”?

(3) Jake is on the edge y’all. He helped get Liv back and now she’s sleeping with some black dude who has better muscle tone. #JakeNeedsAHamburger

(4) Speaking of black dudes, hey there’s another one! Is he b613 too??? #YesIHaveJokes

(5) Two things about this first #SoundtrackWin: (a) It’s a definitive win. Bill Withers is ALWAYS a win and (b) Well damn if I didn’t know that Blackstreet sampled “Grandma’s Hands” for “No Diggity” – Shonda just be educating folks!

(5.1) I have to add (c) – these are the lyrics that were playing when Max hid out to confront Charlie:

“Grandma’s hands clapped in church on Sunday morning.
Grandma’s hands played the tambourine so well.
Grandma’s hands used to issue out a warning (gun comes out)
She’d say, “Billy don’t you run so fast,
Might fall on a piece of glass,”

and then when Charlie appeared “Might be snakes there in that grass” #LOVE #IT!


(6) Max Butler (Syria, 6 bodies), Margot Ross (Southeast Asia)  and Simon (Europe, 37 bodies) #RetiredB613

(7) “Bombings are cheating” #AssassinSpeak

(8) David is STILL talking about full immunity, safe houses and secret Grand Juries. Fool. AND look, you’re being recorded #Smdh

(9) LIV IS STILL SCARF-LESS! And those look like cotton pillowcases to me! I’m sure it’s a high thread count but cotton ain’t satin and you know you know better! Well Kerry Washington knows better. Olivia Pope lives in an alternate universe 😉

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(9.1) Sidebar: Annalise DEFINITELY knows better and I bet Cookie do too! Mary Jane is sometimey but a little closer to Liv with that no scarf life and Bow as well! (Blackish) 😉

(10) Russell you lucky that’s all she’s doing is shouting in her sleep, you could wake up with a gun pointed at your temple #JustSaying

(11) Russell: “I heard French, Russian, Farsi, Mandarin, Swahili, Zulu?” / Liv: “Yep” – still time for you to go.

(12) E’rybody has a fake name! In my Oprah voice: “You get a fake name! And you get a fake name!” Russell = Franklin / Alex = Olivia / Mine is Nicole, I use it in Starbucks #ItsJustEasier

(13) Aiiiiiiiight Brian/Russell/Franklin – take charge with your naked sexy self! #OneMoRound!

(14) Well I mean I kinda hear Pops on taking out that monster. She was 14 and he was 29?? Maaaaaan he was a fcking pedophile. Wait, he became a Congressman with a murderer as a father? I mean the Kennedys did it sooo… #TooSoon?

(15) Speaking of executions did y’all know that Utah is returning to using firing squads?? Yep you read that right – Firing. Squads. #TrueStory

(16) Introducing Mellie’s sister! “Soap books are clean” #Harmony

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(17) Loyal? Got her back?? Oooooooh secrets! Tell Mellie Lil Sis says “hey” #Dangerous

(18) See, Liz just mentioned the Kennedys too! Slightly different circumstances but still…

(19) Liz: “Your lil sis is ’50 shades of angry’. It would take a top journalist less than two days to crack her but put Oprah on it and it’s a wrap!” #15Minutes (I say 10 or less)

(20) Mellie: “I BARELY claim that trashy trailer park half So’n’So!” #USvThem!

(21) Pops on death row  like “I died a long time ago I ain’t trying to hear nuthin’ you got to say Ms. Lawyer lady” #GeorgeReed

(22) Liv is on the case! Rocking that white coat and getting her boss walk on. Another step closer to being less shook. Where is her gun tho? #InHerBirkin?

(23) “Safe house” my a*s! They are just sitting ducks. Jake ’bout to gas that whole place. Cheating but effective #JustSaying

(24) Cyrus re Harmony: “We’re on the edge of a great storm here. There’s a strange wind, it’s too warm. You know it’s coming. It’s scary.” #BringingRuin

(25) Team what Cyrus??? “Team FitzMel” or “Team Mellitz” L.M.A.O!! “Whatever the hell it is, I hate it and I do not want it. Ever!” #Comedy!

(26) Well my goodness… What IS Harmony wearing?? Mellie’s voice went up 8 octaves “Oh Harmony it’s so good to see you, welcome to the White House” #HighPitchedLies

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(27) Cyrus: “You look . . . festive” / Harmony: “How’s your prostitute??” #ItsADraw

(28) Cyrus is such an a*s and I LOVE IT! That look on his face at the end of that scene! #OUTSTANDING!!

(29) Huck was like “Oh killing that teacher dude? Oh yeah I get it” #TortureFirst #SlowDeath #NotPretty

(30) Yep just like I said re that “safe house”, e’rybody dead or dying #DamnShame

(31) Jake v. Charlie – somebody got to die right? Oh wait, nah Jake lived to kill another day #MyNerves!!!

(32) Fitz to Mellie: “I ain’t eating dinner with that woman, WE ain’t related” #GoodLuckBoo

(33) I didn’t understand that look Cy gave to the Secretary of Commerce – Umm was that supposed to mean something? #?????

(34) Really David? Asking Charlie if he’s “sure it was Ballard” who f*cked up his face?? David is driving me crazy!! #WiseUp! #MrPeabody (Good call Charlie)

(35) Huck: “Jake isn’t Jake anymore, Quinn” #GoneMadDog

(36) OPA is such a light team nowadays #ThreePeople

KATIE LOWES, GUILLERMO DIAZ, KERRY WASHINGTON

(37) Quinn talkin’ bout she picking up tampons. LIAR! Something tells me that lying to Liv is NOT a good look #MaybeItsJustMe

(38) Y’all do NOT have Jake #DangerWillRobinson I CAN’T WATCH!!!

(39) Harmony: “It’s important to use ALL parts of the animal” #SoapMaking #DeerFat #Duck #PlainOldBacon

(40) Mellie should have let that “Fitz” ish go. Why check her on that issue? Hell “I” call him Fitz. 😉

(41) Did Mellie just say “I AM better than you”? And called her half sister’s mother a “home wrecking whore”???!?? Even if it’s true you don’t say it to her face! #DAYUM!

(42) Harmony don’t know her a*s can end up dead messing with this crew? #CarefulMa #Careful

(43) Charlie to Huck: “How sad were you when RadioShack went under? Did you cry? Be honest” #FUNNY!

(44) Fitz: “You want to do my job? Every day you have to decide between something terrible that you hate and something horrible that you hate” #WelcomeToThePresidency #JustAskObama

(45) Mellie to Fitz: “You were supposed to be ME in there! You were supposed to do what ‘I’ do” #YouFailedFitz

(46) Aiiiiight Mels, don’t slip back into “Smelly Mellie” messing around with that home grown stuff. Like you said “hootch” gets the job done #DRUNK!

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(47) Quinn to Liv: “Who that black man sitting on your sofa?” / Liv: “Girl, Bye” #ShutsDoor

(48) “Don’t worry about Liv, she’s safe as long as I’m alive” / Huck: “You wouldn’t” / Jake: “You want to take that chance?” Now THAT sounded like a threat to me!!! Shonda!!

(49) Jake is for real gone y’all. It’s too much! Did Liv even say thank you for the rescue? She’s wearing Fitz’s ring again. Russell’s fly a*s is still in her bed. It’s too MUCH!! #HeSnapped!

(50) #SoundtrackWin!! Sly & The Family Stone’s “Que Sera Sera“!! YAAAAAASSSSSS! #PERFECT!

(51) These four sitting up here like it’s the last day of Assassin camp #GonnaMissYouGuys!

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(52) And again here comes David with that Pollyanna “we’re the good guys, we get justice” talk / Quinn: “Nah b, not this time. Good guys lose, white hats burn” #ItsOver

(53) Charlie kissed “Robin” on the lips, told the crew to “stay alive” and chucked up the deuces #Holla

(54) David: “Liv is NOT gonna like this” #HeGoneTell

(55) Awww look at Fitz being supportive and Cyrus being Cyrus #Shady #SatanLike

(56) Is the stuff Fitz is telling Harmony about Mellie true? Or is he just spinning ish like a pro? Guess it really doesn’t matter. “Que sera sera” for now Harmony #MelliesSpinOff?? 😉

(57) Liv: “Y’all know I figured this out right?” / Pops: “Shut up boy I got this” #SacrificesYo

(58) I TOTALLY forgot that David was there when Jake massacred everybody #AwwwJames 🙁

(59) So NO ONE stopped to think about how Jake found out about the safe house??? Rosen needed Huck to sweep his office! #SomebodyGoneDie

(60) I’m going to disagree with Liv about the Congressman coming clean. I get the approach but I’m just saying… Oh, well I didn’t know the Congressman was living a non-life, “trapped” so you say #Fine!

(61) SOUNDTRACK WIN NUMBER 3! Otis Redding’s “I’ve Got Dreams to Remember

(62) Huck to Liv: “I’m here to protect you from Jake.”

(63) LAST TWO MINUTES:

(a) OH NO JAKE! David DIES???

(b) Wait, WHAT??

(c) HOLLY??

(d) OH. SHIT! WELL I’LL BE GODDAMNED! HOLLY IS B613!

(e) YAAAAAAY JAKE IS STILL JAKE!

(f) Of course Liv knows! Come on Huck & Quinn!! “Do not lie! Do. Not. Lie. To. Me!”

(g) Jake: “HE’S COMING!”

(h) And then there was a knock at the door… Russell looking SHOOK! Because GODDAMNIT PAPA POPE IS BACK! “Hello Olivia”

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Coming up: Papa Pope.

#SCANDAL



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