‘Being Mary Jane’ Recap – “Purging and Cleansing” (S3:E9)

(1) Remember we left off with Pops Roundtree going H.A.M. on Patrick’s a*s. MJ tells her father they ambushed him. Pops is like I’m tired of protecting adults while children suffer, no mas! PREACH!!! “This fight ain’t pretty but it’s necessary.” AMEN!! MJ agrees to go pick up D’Asia as planned and Pops walks off to check on Mama Helen. She stay coughing.

(2) D’Asia is at Kara’s big beautiful house doing homework and hanging with Kara’s younger son. I would have moved back in there as well. Actually I would have never moved out in the first place. We gon’ figure this out or the house gets sold.

(3) D’Asia gets in MJ’s car with all the questions: “Where’s my Daddy? Where’s Grandpa?” Basically you picking me up is hella unusual – what’s up Auntie??

(4) She really is a cute little girl, the scenes in the bathroom and MJ reading to her were sweet. I know MJ’s ovaries are pulsating right now. Poor thing.


(5) Cue Jill Scott‘s lovely new song: “Jahraymecofasola

I would climb inside a red balloon floating towards the noon, for you
I would fly across the midnight sky, the stars and the moon, for you too
And on that flight I devise a new way to say how much I love you
Tippy tah, sight ah tay, I’m still working on it, baby please forgive me
I think I’d try, how bout jahraymecofasola
How bout jahraymecofasola
How bout jahraymecofasola
How bout jahraymecofasola

(6) Awwww MJ is reading D’Asia Malala Yousafzai’s book “I Am Malala” Good job show team!

(7) MJ stands in the doorway watching D’Asia sleep for a few seconds. At this point her ovaries are about to explode. She ends up on the phone with someone telling them to come back? Umm who dat??

(8) D’Asia shows up in MJ’s bedroom doorway and is like “I’m not okay” so yeah I want to get in your bed. Thx Auntie

(9) Ooohhhhh MJ was on the phone with PJ telling him to come home. Hmmmm

(10) D’Asia to MJ: “I love you.” (beat) “Is my Daddy back on drugs?” BAM! Okay YES it’s complicated but generally speaking I feel like you shouldn’t lie to children especially if they are astute enough to ask you certain kinds of questions AND YET you don’t want to unnecessarily burden them with information that they realistically may not be ready to receive yet. Dilemma. Clearly it’s on her mind so maybe not a flat out lie but perhaps not the entire truth either and definitely a reassurance that no matter what she is safe and her father loves her always. But maybe that’s just me.

(10.1) Well I do know for d*mn certain I would not have awakened her with a song about diarrhea #EyeRoll

(11) Breakfast time – MJ don’ gave the chile yogurt and granola and the yogurt was quite likely that sour cream tasting greek stuff. Smh and nah that girl don’t want no d*mn kale and quinoa salad for lunch. MJ is funny. Not mad at Starbucks being the solution – a bougie solution but I’ll take it.


(12) Cut to the school’s parking lot and Patrick is sitting in his “vintage” car waiting and look who rolls up – Khalilah Joi!!!!! Looking so pretty and professional. Do it girl, DO IT!!!

(13) Sorry I had a moment. Patrick tells Khalilah (her character’s name is Charmane but I’m probably going to keep saying Khalilah cause that’s what y’all should remember – she’s great ain’t she??) he was waiting to bring D’Asia her lunch. She asks him about his job which she found out about because D’Asia mentioned it the other day. She’s proud of her Dad. He is surprised by this news and tears up a bit, he says its allergies. Alright Patrick imma need you to keep it together Khalilah doesn’t need to know all of your woes – well not yet anyway…

(14) Ohhhhhhh Khalilah nosy! All up in D’Asia’s lunch bag but it’s for a good cause right? 😉 She sees MJ dropping D’Asia off and sees that she already has a lunch bag with her. Yep, something is up girl – your instincts are dead on. Drama honey DRAMA!

(Image Credit: Tiffany Tapley via FB)

(Image Credit: Khalilah’s friend Tiffany Tapley via FB)

(15) MJ is running down the Patrick situation to Kara and Kara tells her she’s taken on her parent’s fight and that MJ has allowed them to use her as their guard dog. A bit strong I think. And to emphasize the “extra-ness” of this convo MJ replies “Oh so I’m their bitch?” What?? Annnnnnd yep, Kara says “You’ve been like a pitbull for them” / “a ferocious bitch” / “It’s not your fight, it’s their fight.” I don’t fully agree with Kara on this one. I get what she’s saying but (a) that’s family and (b) since when does MJ have a problem with being selfish???

(15.1) Continuing, Kara says “everyone is going to turn around and wonder why you drowned. You have some good shit happening for you right now MJ and you need to lean into that.” Valid points but that doesn’t mean I abandon my family especially in this particular instance and ESPECIALLY if I’m legitimately in position to help. But again maybe that’s just me.

(16) See! So then MJ tells her father she can’t pick up D’Asia from school. The ONE fcking time MJ actually does officially need to be of assistance is when she pulls out. Pops is like fine I’ll just reschedule your mother’s appt because HE is going to make it work. This is irritating the fck outta me. The last 3 and half seasons we seen MJ write Patrick checks, host baby showers for Niecy, let Niecy stay at her house, help Niecy with her resume, etc. More to the point I don’t recall seeing her mother OR her father actually ask her to do those things. So NOW when your father asks you to pick up a child from school you say you can’t? Okay.

(17) Pops is like this IS a big damn deal! “How many children have to suffer because the adults can’t get their crap together.” Again, PREACH!! He tells her to not to worry about it, “I got this, this is what I’ve been doing.” Seriously I’m super annoyed right now.


(18) Also, I LOVE RICHARD ROUNDTREE! PJ shows up and Pops is like (a) what are you doing here and (b) there’s only one side and if you’re on the other one get out. Betta tell him!

(19) MJ is meeting with someone. Someone who checked her phone while MJ was talking. Btw, Gabbi’s makeup looks super pretty in this scene. Gorgeous!

(19.1) Hmm I think that was a book publisher? She doesn’t seem like a good fit – checking her phone, not apologizing for checking her phone and then rushing MJ up out of her office. Not cool.

(20) MJ goes back to the office and is accosted by Marisol who makes a pitch to get herself on the “Talk Back” team. Guest pundit, production team, she’ll take whatever she just wants to be down. MJ says sorry (but not sorry) there’s no money left in the budget, she reassures her that something will come along and then kicks her out of her office. #ByeGirl

(21) Ahhhhhhh MJ went back to Clark Atlanta and brought in the truth sayer to be part of the think tank #Nina

(21.1) Grown up Chuckie doll a.k.a. “Lance” is the show’s producer

(21.2) Yang-Jin is the associate producer who was snagged from CNN. Whatever. Nina’s role is a youth consultant. Yang-Jin notes that he and Nina are only four years apart adding “demographically speaking don’t you think that’s redundant?” A few things: (a) I already don’t like him and (b) he should shut up #MyTwoCents


(21.3) Then the OTHER student from class who had a lot to say walks in carrying coffee and poppin’ off at the mouth about the fact that Truth Sayer is there. They quickly have a charged exchange. Well he isn’t he arrogant AF??? “Okay what does SHE bring to the table that I don’t have?” “Khalil” is Mr. Arrogant’s name. Wackness. Lance checked is a*s – if you don’t want this internship feel free to bounce. #Well??

(21.4) MJ to Khalil: “So you in or out? In? Good. Shut your face, pass out the coffee and start taking notes. Nina is a latte cool with you?” #Checked

(22) MJ and her team got kicked out of the main conference room. They end up in the community kitchen. Seriously there were no other rooms available? I know her office is small but shouldn’t y’all have at least given that a try?? They end up at MJ’s house. I guess. I still would have tried my work office before bringing everyone back to my place. This meeting is already at least an hour in. #Smh

(23) Nina and Yang-Jin get into a heated convo about black people and welfare. Nina points out that it’s actually Caucasian women who use the most assistance but don’t nobody want to talk about that FACT. Yang-Jin’s point is that Asians typically don’t use any government assistance at all. He made it personal – talking about how his parents never took a dime and they worked for every cent they got. Nina of course fired right back and “you assume mine didn’t?” She educated his a*s right quick! Her mother is a professor and her father is a lawyer so fall back YJ. Again, I’m pretty sure I’m not supposed to like him which is good because I don’t.

(23.1) Also what I didn’t like or I guess what I could have done with out was Nina’s assumption that HE was thinking because she’s black and wears her hair natural she’s must be on welfare – was it the natural component?? Wack.

(24) Damnit look who’s on her doorstep AGAIN! But for real CeCe – what on earth do you want this time??? SIGH! Did she just say “why are you fighting our friendship”??? She crazy as hell. THIS time she wants MJ to make an appearance at the bookstore to drum up business or something like that. CeCe tells MJ to not make her get on her knees because when she does it ain’t for beggin’. Well I’ll be… Looky here heffa MJ ain’t checking for you like that so FALLBACK! Just aggressive and sh*t! But really PLEASE don’t make CeCe get on her knees PLEASE!

(25) I can’t. Then this heffa asks what’s going in the dining room. A brain trust and some good smelling Chinese food she says. “Let me get one of those egg rolls.” I CAN NOT! CeCe then starts reading the post-it notes and dictating what the revamped “Talk Back” should look like. Like for real she just stepped in and started running the meeting. Telling folks to write ish down and whatnot. Girl…


(26) MJ zones out and listens to a voice over running back conversations she’s had with CeCe – the negative conversations. She’s recalling how she came to be exhorted by this woman who is now holding court in her house. “I’m a survivor. I do whatever it takes to survive.” Not entirely certain why she THIS particular VO is playing right now since she is allowing her to remain in her home but I’m sure it will become clear eventually. #Smdh

(27) Patrick’s car stops in the middle of the street. He needs Uber.

(28) He was on his way to D’Asia’s school. So he runs there and arrives just as Pops is picking up D’Asia. Oh God is he going to make a scene in the parking lot?? Please please PLEASE don’t make a scene in the parking lot. Why not just go to his father’s house after she got picked up? After you got off work because you damn sure don’t need to lose your job now. Come on Patrick!

(29) That’s right Khalilah, talk to him girl. Tell him this is not the place to be acting a fool and letting everyone know ish is fucked up in D’Asia’s home life right. Not here Patrick. Not here.

(30) Cue Jill’s song again:

On my way I realized I didn’t have a gift for you
So I racked my mind on what it is now that I am supposed to do
Then it hit me I guessed the love in the air hugged rain before it falls down
Put infinity into a melody and see how it sounds

Sounds like jahraymecofasola
Sounds like jahraymecofasola
Sounds like jahraymecofasola

(31) Khalilah takes him back to her office. He calls work, “I ain’t feeling well, be back in tomorrow.”  She offers him a ride home and he tells her the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I appreciated that. Good job Patrick. “I’m a drug addict.” #Heavy

(32) Khalilah is dropping pearls: “Sounds like they gave you a real boundary instead of rope this time.” Patrick is whining about why come he can’t escape his past. Khalilah: “It’s about what you’re gonna do now” TELL HIM GIRL!!! Patrick: “I’m going to get my daughter.” Sigh. Okay.

(33) Cut to: Patrick bursts into his father’s house to retrieve D’Asia. Gives her a big hug which Niecy observes from the doorway. Once again Niecy is feeling some kinda way about the father he is now vs the father she had. Baby girl you gotta grow up and let that go. Perhaps therapy?? Just a suggestion…

(34) Pops and PJ let him leave with D’Asia. Maybe it was for the best…

(35) They then flashback (short time frame) to hear the rest of Khalilah’s speech: “A lot of times people look outside themselves for blame and for answers when really all these conversations we’re having, the ones you have with other people, they’re just dress rehearsals for the ones we need to have with ourselves.” A-MEN!

(36) Meanwhile, Pops Roundtree is having it out with himself. He is so good. I love watching his scenes. Mama Helen observes his struggle and suggest that maybe they should have Patrick and D’Asia move back in with them. Er…

(37) Paul Sr. apologizes to his wife, tells her they should have sold the house and moved to Florida, should have traveled more, maybe she wouldn’t be sick if she had not had to deal with all of this chaos, says they should have let Patrick figure this ish out on his own. They’ve blown their savings and they are right back where they started. Dayum. PJ and Niecy are on the other side of the door listening to this exchange. Again, dayum.

Pops: “Helen, please let me say I’m sorry to you. It may be the last thing I’ll be able to give you.”

Helen: “Baby… No, no. You’ve always done the right thing.”



(38) I gotta say it again, the make up team really is on point this week. Gabbi’s face is – say it with me now – ON FLEEK!

(39) MJ is telling her “Prime Time” audience that she will be bringing “Talk Back” back. More guests and experts, etc. And she gets to bring back her quotes. Girl ain’t nobody missing your quotes, maybe your substantive content but definitely not your quotes. Oh wait, is it just me??

(40) After her broadcast, MJ is back in her office. She picks up her phone to call Kara who is one, maybe two offices away. So she did take Mark’s office – good for her. MJ wants to call her family – of course you do because that’s your family. Kara tells her to “be strong.” Sigh.

(40.1) Remember how I was annoyed before? Right. But MJ’s line: “I feel like if I don’t intervene now I’ll just have a bigger mess to clean up later” annoys me for a separate reason. That fcking condescension. Really? Perhaps part of the problem is that you view your families problem has a mess YOU and YOU ONLY have to clean up. Why can’t everyone work together to figure out a solution IF that is what needs to happen. It doesn’t have to be just one person solving the problem. #Aggravation

(40.2) Kara: “You need to see who else is capable of showing up” – okay I’ll give her that line. MJ tells Kara she should apply that nugget to her own life. Kara gives her another “Bye Felicia” – Smh. Two things: (a) wrong place for that AND (b) you already said it. #Fail

(41) Sidebar: I am LOVING everyone’s wardrobe this episode. The women are SERVING!! YAAAAAASSSS HUNTIES!!!

(42) So in the very next scene, Kara utilizes her own advice. She goes home and asks her “roommate”/”ex-husband” how he got here. He’s like why are you fcking me tonight? I’m trying to work. So she runs down how SHE got here. Here being overworked and underpaid divorced mother of two living with her ex-husband – “Working class Puerto Rican girl from the Bronx, with a gambler but good-natured father and a mother who worked three jobs to keep a roof over their heads.” There was more but I didn’t have time to do her whole speech. Just know that I loved all of it – she delivered her whole truth. Good job.

(42.1) John’s response: “Your mind games just get better and better I’m both envious and nauseated.” Wooooooow. Okay so he’s either a straight up ahole or 100% downtrodden or officially out of fcks to give OR just straight up bitter??


(42.2) Kara wants to know why he’s okay with having zero to no ambition and watch her take care of everything. John says he’s always been this person. She lied to him and herself when she said who he was was enough. INteresting. His affair happened when he knew he was not enough and he moved back when she figured out she didn’t make enough money. Very very interesting. Real convo they are having. Go on…

(42.3) She thanked him for HIS whole truth. Told him he was right, his ambition was never enough for her BUT their kids need electricity so get that damn essay written and bring some more money in partner. #RealTalk!

(43) Paul Jr is in the kitchen giving Niecy the business: “I know you didn’t get what D’Asia got but time’s up. I’m sorry but this is your life and you have to own it.” More real talk.

(43.1) It is worth noting that although I am tired of seeing Niecy catch hell every episode I do acknowledge that Paul Jr IS saying exactly what needs to be said. And yes I will admit I’m happy it’s coming from someone else and not MJ this time. Told her she needed to grow up at the rate her kids need, not the rate at which she’s comfortable. Well shit PJ. This is a real talk episode for reals!

(44) Niecy shares a little more of her testimony. She tells PJ that she’s the one who found her father when he overdosed. She made the phone call. She asked her grandfather for help when everything went down. Basically e’rybody has a heavy load to carry. Poor boo.


(45) PJ: “People can help you but they’re not gonna rescue you.” #Truth!

(45.1) PJ says he is going to put her on a two year plan to help her get it together. Q for PJ: What happens if you go to jail? OR spend ALL your money fighting going to jail? Just curious. Okay continue.

(46) PJ says she has to get more help from her baby daddies (what a horrible phrase but sigh he’s right). He is going to help her with pre-school and day care for the kids AND help her get her cosmotolgy license. AND then maybe help with a car – oh yeah and her credit. Per usual, Niecy still doing the most: “That sounds great and all but wouldn’t it be easier if I just came to Cali with you. PJ: “oh hell no. You tripping.” #Right

(47) Still slightly aggravated about the way that convo was introduced but yes her family doing for themselves is a step in the right direction. BUT full out abandonment is some bullsh*t.

(48) Good GAWD! Cece is killing me! Dis heffa STAY posted up outside MJ’s house. Is she scaling a fence?? I know ppl can’t just walk up to her front door off the street?? Something is wrong with her gate? Wtf???

(49) Sidebar: LOVE MJ’s outfit! That red skirt and white top – YAAAAAAAAS HUNTY!!!

(50) Cece tells her congrats re “Talk Back” coming back and wait for it – Cece wants to know about compensation for her input into getting that episode greenlit. Her “valuable contribution” #EyeRoll and a #BishPlease

(51) Annnnnnnnd of course And MJ is totally caught off guard. SIGH!! I wish a bish STILL would! That’s why you should have called your lawyer the FIRST time this claimed socially conscious con artist showed up on your damn doorstep talking about extortion. Just RIDICULOUS!


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